At lunch today one of the teachers was telling a story about something that happened with her husband many years ago, and she said, "I've forgiven him, but I haven't forgotten about it." Another teacher responded with,"That's okay, I think those two are a lot more mutually exclusive than we think." Conversation shifted, so we didn't get to discuss it further, but I loved what she said. (You can read more of her profound and witty comments here.) Sarah is a veteran blogger, so I know she'll be happy her comment inspired a blog post:)
Anyway, it made me think about a conversation that we had in bible class a while back when someone told a similar story about being able to forgive, but having a harder time forgetting. My wonderful husband/bible class teacher shared similar wisdom that day. Why do we think forgive and forget are like peanut butter and jelly? Jesus asks that we forgive, but doesn't mention forgetting...our society put the two together and we mistake it for truth. Here was the kicker for me--if we forget, are we really even forgiving, or are we avoiding true forgiveness? Instead, when we remember the pain someone caused us every time we see them and choose to love them anyway....that's real forgiveness, and it's a lot harder. Keith's words in bible class that day convicted me. I love when that happens, and I'm thankful for my sweet husband who is wise beyond his years!
All of this has gotten me thinking, what other values and principles do we assume go hand in hand with our faith when they really don't?
2 comments:
Hey!
I didn't realize you had a blog, too! Yea! More to read on my days in bed. Have a great week.
Well, I am humbled! "Oh, be careful, little mouth, what you say!" (as if my mouth is little! HA! :-)
You KNOW I have all kinds of comments about that -- because my comment was learned the hard way. Even though I have forgiven, the pain comes back with the memory. I can't erase that. I can forgive every time it comes back, exactly like Keith mentioned, but I can't really forget it. And, it never hurts to learn from those kinds of pain -- not to learn not to trust, but learn ways to improve relationships.
I'm not deep enough to think of any others right now -- you'll have to wait until life hands them to me! :-)
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